I don’t think I’ve ever seen Charlie care so much about anything before this episode of “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.” “These are, like, an investment. This is my future here,” Charlie says about his immaculately kept album of Garbage Pail Kids. It’s the first time, I feel, that he’s ever meticulously catalogued and taken ownership for anything.
I wonder if we’ll learn anything from this information.
definition 2b: a person primarily interested in political office for selfish or other narrow usually short-sighted reasons.]
I did not make up that definition. Merriam Webster did. “Selfish or other narrow usually short-sighted reasons” seem to be the sole reason that The Gang does anything, so it was only time before they attempted to become politicians. Mac claims that they’re being ‘blasted in the ass’ by taxes and Sweet Dee’s retort is to go vote. This enrages not only Charlie, but the rest of the gang. Frank says ‘you have to be a real low life piece of shit to get involved in politics.” Think The Gang qualifies?
After being overpowered by both Mac and Frank as Dennis’ campaign manager, Charlie slips into the pub’s office to do a little backdoor wheeling and dealing to win Dennis over. He convinces Dennis with the flare of a 40s muckracker. Phase one complete.
While Mac is trying to solicit a bribe from union reps and Sweet Dee is getting all whored up to run too, Dennis and Charlie hit the mall to press the flesh of their constituents.
Then, in typical Charlie fashion, we find him embrace his demented, creative side while shooting an advertisement for Dennis’ campaign. Here is the speech he scripts for Dennis: “Hello fellow American. This, you should vote, me. I leave power. Good! Thank you. Thhhaaankk you! If you vote me, I’m hot. Taxes, they’ll be lower. Sun. The democratic vote for me is right thing to do Philadelphia, so do!” That coupled with the fact that Dennis is standing in front of two beach towels–one, a million dollar bill, the other an American flag–equals total political success, Charlie surely thinks.
It’s from this scene that we learn a few more things about Charlie: that he is dyslexic and that he shares the crusty ol’ futon with Dennis’ dad. It really just keeps getting better and better with him.
In obvious Deep Throat fashion, he meets with Frank in a dark parking garage to settle a bribe only to learn that the one thing he really cares about is at stake: his meticulous collection of Garbage Pail Kids. Charlie’s selfless side surfaces again because the next thing we see is Frank holding the album–Charlie gave it all up for Dennis! His dreams, his future! Whatta guy. Whatta idiot.
As soon as his hands are on the smear tape that Frank was holding over their campaign, Dennis just gives up on the campaign and we see Charlie finally flip. Like, for realz. He twitches, he pokes his head in and out like a lizard, he slams his shoe on the bar destroying the tape and he all around looses his shit. He gave up EVERYTHING, “my blood, sweat, tears… my Garbage Pail Kids.”
We have learned a valuable lesson about Charlie in this episode: he cares more about Garbage Pail Kids than reading, more about Dennis’ comptroller campaign than his Garbage Pail Kids and not at all about himself, his self esteem or the fact that he shares a couch with an old, sweaty bald man. Oh, and that he’ll always come out on the bottom of The Gang’s shit pile.